Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Pet Peeves




     So for today, I present to you, my "Bete Noire/Pet Peeve" list.  So far.  Knowing me, lots more to come.  Hope you enjoy another cartoon courtesy of my husband, Davis Jaye.

     This is my ever changing, ever growing list of pet peeves. I may be guilty of a few of these from time to time; after all I am not a saint, nor a monument to justice, or running for office I try not to though, because hypocrisy doesn't look good on anyone.   "Liste des bete noire" is French for List of Pet Peeves and I think it sounds better.  Which brings me to #1-

1.  Pretentiousness, and presumptuousness, in any manner, shape, or form.

2.  Twitter lingo and/or acronyms being substituted for honest to God communication.  Love the "Ted" the bear  poster, where he points out, "It's b-e-f-o-r-e, not B4!  We speak English, not f'in bingo!"

3.  Ubiquity- whether it's Starbucks, Walmart, or Taylor Swift.  You can't call yourself unique, authentic, or special, if you are everywhere. 

4. Kind of "opening" one up and changing it to OBLIVIOUSNESS IN ALL ITS GLORY INCLUDING... People who stop right as they get off of an escalator to decide which department they want to go to- oblivious to the fact that there are other people who are trying to exit the escalator.  THE FACT THAT I WROTE THIS I REALIZE IS POINTLESS: ANY OBLIVIOUS PERSON WILL NOT READ THE WRITING ON THE WALL.

5.  People who do not clean up after themselves in public restrooms.  Enough said.

6.  Rudeness.  I am the nicest person in the world, next to my husband.   However, if someone is rude to me, watch out.  At the very least, I will set the Karma Wheel in motion.   Yes, I am that powerful.

7.  Customers in restaurants who make a point through one way or another, to show you how special they are.  I am sorry you did not get enough love as a child but it really is not necessary to take it out on the staff of a restaurant.

Warning, (or promise, however you choose to look at it);  I worked in the restaurant industry for many years, so there will be many peeves that pertain to restaurants. 

8Packaging.   Toys, cd's, movies, packaged food, are only a few examples.  Case in point; I just sliced my thumb opening a plastic jar of wild rice. 

9.  Vague and ambiguous classified ads.  Whether it be for an apartment, job, or an item: Who? What?  Where? When? How much?  That's it, that's all; "just the facts m'am"

10.  People past the age of 8, who have not learned how to control their temper; or worse yet, choose not to.

11.  People, who choose "personal expression", (wardrobe, piercing, tattoos, hairstyle/color), or actions  that naturally draw attention, but then get bent out of shape when it does.  "If you don't want it talked about, don't do it."

12.  Use of the royal "we".  Passive aggressive at best, condescending at worst.  When someone asks,
"did we do the ya da da da da?"  I tend to reply  " I did the ya da da da da, but I don't recall your
presence; so no, we did not do the ya da da da da."  That usually takes care of it.

13.  This is dedicated to people who live in Los Angeles; why in the name of la dee da are so many parking spots marked for "compact cars", (and even the regular spots in parking lots are not that big) when so many drivers in LA drive SUV's?  Drove me absolutely crazy when I lived there, and I didn't even drive an SUV.

14.  People who do not return their shopping carts to the store or to the designated corrals, but leave them to roll willy nilly in the parking lot.  It's not that hard.  After all they rolled them up and down probably every aisle in the grocery store, what's a few more feet?  The only excuse is if they have a baby and don't want to leave the car with the baby in there while they return the cart.  Other than this
I think it's just pure laziness.

15.  Unsolicited advice.  You'll probably see a post about this one day.

16.  Unwarranted piousness; which covers pretty much everyone on Earth.  Meaning, unless you are God, please don't tell me that what is in His plan.   

17.  People who use religion to make others feel insecure, or, I don't know; to be honest, I am not sure what their objective is.  All I know is, I live in the United States of America,  AND ONE OF THEIR MAIN FOUNDING PRINCIPLES WAS RELIGIOUS FREEDOM!

18.  Return to my packaging peeve;  well sort of- I guess this really is a vent about today's toys.  Look for a future post about this.  Till then,  is it really necessary to make them harder to open than Fort Knox?  Please let me know if there is a parent out there who made it through the holidays without at least one paper cut, gash or bruise from opening a kid's toy.  Don't get me started about the ordeals of putting a toy together, or why they don't last past 1 DAY of normal kids' play.

19.  Some ecards. I'll be doing a post on this someday to vent my thoughts, but for now I think it's just enough to say I'm tired of them.

20. Wow, I'm at #20.  Snarky moms.  May do a post on this one day.  It kinda covers a lot of my pet peeves.  Ubiquitous, and celebrated rudeness.  Yea, motherhood is tough, crazy, and funny.  I'm no saint, and I have my snarky days, which is enough for me; don't need to see books about being snarky, I got that covered.

21.  Lack of editing.  Spell check ain't always gonna cover it folks.  Yea, I am guilty from time to time, but I check with Strunk and White regularly, and read my posts over several times before posting anything.  Lately I have noticed poor grammar on sites that can afford to hire editors, as well as in published magazines and books!  Drives me nuts.

...to be continued