Tuesday, December 29, 2015

The Prude Has A Question

These can be found at OffBeatTreats.com


This post is from last year, but saw these around again this year, (thankfully not at our house) and just wondering... 
Did anyone get a Candy Pooper in their stocking?  Just a "Yes" or "No" will do.

I know, some will say, "lighten up you ol' Prude".  Well, after my declaration of being a prude, and the conformation of the fact, one should hardly be surprised.

It's just that I LOVE CHOCOLATE.  And the thought of eating something that comes out of something's bum... even if it's a plastic figurine... blehhhh...bblblblleleellelehhhYUCK!!!


If this is your kind of thing, so be it.  Rest assured if I'm a friend and drop by for a visit, YOU CAN KEEP ALL OF YOUR CHOCOLATE TO YOURSELF.  Which may be the aim.  You greedy little thing.  Here's some of the other holiday poopers for ya':
These lovelies are from Candy Crate
While looking for examples for this post, I initially found these on Amazon.  Of course they offered options; as in "New" or "Used".  So I have another question:
Would those who want a Used Pooper kindly step forward?
Again, you can keep your candy to yourself.

Oh, and if you missed out on these, not to worry, look what the Easter Bunny may bring-
No thanks, I'm good.  
The thought of fuzzy tail fur being amidst my jelly beans... is unappetizing to say the least.  If you're curious,  the other candy poopers include, one for St. Patrick, as well as The President.  Oddly enough, I did not find a candy poopin' cupid, for Valentine's Day.  Guess nobody wants to mess with the lughve... Religious holidays, fine; President of the United States, fine; but the Chocolate Industry's L-O-V-E day~can't touch that.  You think?  Wouldn't think even the most ardent and worthy lover would stand much chance of anything, had they bestowed one of these on the object of their desire.

And I thought Doggy Doo was tasteless.  However; if you need a good laugh, I do suggest taking a gander at The Rules for How To Play Doggy Doo.  The whole idea of the winner being the one with the most... "mess" in their shovel; I found hysterical. 

Then under "Set-Up: Please have all players wash their hands before beginning."  Seriously?  Why? 

Note, "Important: Pump the leash handle QUICKLY and FIRMLY." 

I nearly shot soda out my nose- we're still talking about Doggy Doo, right?

Thank goodness for those "Helpful Hints and Clean Up Tips."
Personally, if I've bought something, I'd prefer more tips than hints.
But that's just me.
   The last one under "Doggie" got me choked up: after trying all else, they advise to "try blowing into the dog's mouth."  No thank you.
   The best?  The game retails for about $20.  Should you ever need  (of course you would) to buy more "food" (that becomes the "doo") for your doggie, that goes for $14 on Amazon.

Seems to me, you'd be better off with a real puppy.